Am I Really Moving On!?!??!

I have not talked to him in about 2 weeks, other than discussing our kids. He hasn't really initiated any of our conversations. I called him because I needed to know what the outcome of a meeting at J's school was and he wanted to know how Lil D was feeling after being sick. It really hurt for a few days, but oddly today I thought to myself ,"Hmmm. I haven't thought of him all day. For a couple of days, in fact."

So there, I am cured! Even as I am writing this I don't feel sadness or pain. Maybe I'm really done. But as sure as I am standing here, he will call me sometime soon and I will be faced with the pain of it again.... It ALWAYS happens this way!!!!!!

On an unrelated sidenote: I cried like a fool today watching The Color Purple for the 100 millionth time. How many times am I going to cry while watching Shug Avery run back to her Daddy's church singing, "God Is Trying to Tell You Something"? PMS is a B*TCH!

At least I am feeling better about The Devil and our lack of relationship. Today. Tomorrow is another story.

Sassy Still Plays the Fool

I love him. He loves me, but not as much as I love him. I'm ready to take to the relationship level. He's not. He told me not to wait on him...

Moving on..... cause my momma didn't raise no fool.

Same old stuff, different day

Me and Devil again... Tuesday night, at out oldest son's lacrosse game, he told me how much he loved me, was working on getting out of the relationship he was in and wanted to remarry me one day soon.  Yeah, he was trippin'. Of course, it all sounds really good, but I've been screwed by him too many times before. I'm just sitting back, listening and observing. He just went on and on about how he made a mistake...blah, blah, blah...

So, after his soul bearing session on Tuesday night, I have not heard from him until today.
I called him a couple of times this week and he either didn't answer or was really distant. I only talked to him today because we were exchanging the youngest and we had to determine a place to meet.I called him out on ignoring me this week and he said that he was busy, that it was a bad week. I said, so- I had a hard week too. I told him that I thought that his declarations of love were real on Tuesday, but that if I was on the wrong page, PLEASE correct me. He didn't say anything, so I just ended the call.

When I met him to pick up Lil D, he had all kinds of intense looks, like he wanted to take me right then and there. I just ignored him. We made plans to go to J's next game, at our alma mater and then I jetted.

What is up with this? Getting on my nerves... What is he trying to do to me?

Is This Love Tied to My Va-jay-jay?

I've been hot and heavy with the ex for the past few weeks. We have yet to define anything, but my hormones have been trying to define it. When we are together all we do is have sex or TRY to have sex. It makes me feel like those K-Y Jelly commercials. All I can think about is "nutmeg" with him! If we can't have
Nutmeg, there is nothing much there. But I love him soooo much. He says he loves me sooooo much too. But are we in love with the feeling that nutmeg gives us?
Hmmmmm..... still thinking & feeling dumb...

What to do, what to do....

He says that he loves me, he says he wants to uncomplicate his life, he says we need to talk....

What do I say.... nothing... I'm hiding under the covers....

2011 Recap....

Wow, it has been a minute since I have been up here. Last we spoke I had gone on a date with a friend of a friend...BORING! So that didn't work out at all. I tried, but it just wasn't there.

I started student teaching and that was an experience. My cooperating teacher was a hot, mangled mess. I wanted to slap that ho' many a day. That is a story for a different day.

I finally graduated and I got a job even before I graduated!!! Whoo Hoo. I'm Miss Kindergarten Teacha, now! Started that job this week and I am sure that there will be many more stories about that, because my assistant is a trip!

The Young Buck and I decided that friendship was the way to go and lo and behold that boy just asked the chick with the big forehead to marry him, on New Year's Eve! Jesus Wept!

My nephew D is still after these older women. He is now dating Young Buck's wife! I just can't with him anymore. We do not even discuss their relationship after I expressed concern about him dating S and he called me out about not having a man. I was through with him!

But he's right, I STILL don't have a man. Some days I'm okay, because I am trying to get my career off the ground and raise my kids, but other days I am depressed that there are no men in my life, and no real prospects. I am 38 years old and don't have anyone to spend my old age with!

BTW, I had a month long birthday celebration that I enjoyed immensely. 38 is hot!

I had a few rendezvous with my ex - the devil and they were great. The most recent being today. He just rocks my world! (**lmbo -Wanda , In Living Color). But he does. I wish I could get out from under his spell.

That has been my last half of 2011 and despite the not having a man thing, it was okay and I just know that 2012 is gonna be my year... for something!

Happy New Year everyone,

From the Sassiest Girl in the block! Mwah!

Date...

Yes, I finally went on a real date. Yay. (not enthused, can't you tell?) I went out with a friend of a friend. We have been texting and talking on the phone sparingly for about 5 months. He just didn't do it for me in conversation. He wanted to meet him at the fairgrounds for a barbeque selling during May. I was all for it, but dude was trying to sell me tickets! Uhhh, no! That was too much. Needless to say, I didn't go and we didn't speak for another 3 months. My friend who hooked us up saw him out somewhere and told me he was still single and he was looking good, so I texted him and we set up a date for last Saturday. Yes, we went out during a hurricane!
So here are the details:
Name: J
Age: 39
Marital Status: never been married
Occupation: works in a document storage facility
Looks: so-so-- he is tall and not too big, not too skinny, close hair cut-- just plain and regular
Dinner: TGIFriday's - and dude tried to use a coupon- FAIL
I tried to get him to go to the late show @ the cheap movies, but he wasn't game-- it would have ended too late for him-- suspicious!
Verdict: lukewarm- he still doesn't do it for me
We made tentative plans for a date sometime in the future, but it is Wednesday, and he hasn't called me yet. I guess that he wasn't impressed by me either. C'est le vie-- such is life.

What do y'all think?

SassyMe