Got Goals?

Hmmmmmm. Eyes, you asked if I had any goals for the New Year and I got to thinkin'.....
What is it I want to accomplish in 2011--0ther than paying my bills and not killing my kids and keeping them on the right track.

The thing that I kept coming up with is.... stop doing the same thing, falling in the same traps.
This pertains to men more than any other thing in my life. I need to stop chasing after the unavailable men in my life.

Man #1-- The Ex Husband... I must admit, I still carry a torch for the man he used to be to me. He is still sexy and can put it down, but he is not the husband, father and provider that he used to be. But he is also not the Devil that I have portrayed him to be. He's somewhere in the middle. He says that he still loves me, but I cannot go through that crap again.... So leave him alone.

Man #2-- The Professor... I really thought that I was going to marry this man, so much so that I told my ex husband how upset I was when the relationship didn't pan out. (But that was a ploy on my part to get some from the ex *yes*) I still am very attracted to him physically and financially, but he is not the man for me. He is so nerdy, part of his charm, and is a good Christian man, but there is no real chemistry there. So why can't I leave him alone?

Man #3-- The Young Buck... Such a tasty delight! Since his latest disappearance I have only had the chance to see him once. He was at band rehearsal on Sunday acting like his regular old self. I tried to keep my distance, but I couldn't. He had me laughing and flirting in no time. He even pushed all up on me and tried to get a smooch. That is where I drew the line though. I feel silly for asking him why he stood me up for my birthday, because this is supposed to be casual and all, but I feel misused. I can try to have a platonic flirtation--ship, but that is all it is going to be!!!

So, I haven;t really laid out any goals, other than leaving these fine, sexy, unavailable men alone. Isn't there anything else to my life? Hopefully buy the New Year I will have some more goals to put up. But what about you guys, do you have goals?

Nuthin' Much Here

So it has been a few weeks since I have seen the young buck and I am okay. I have even been talking to another guy, Mike, on the phone. Decent conversation. That is all...

We had a snow event yesterday and I got the urge to cook! I made grown up Beenie Weenie and Veggie Beef Soup! Yum! The kids were so happy. It has been that long since I have cooked. Sad. Lol! But it has been a cold winter so far. I am sick of this!

The semester is over and I have pretty good grades- 4 A's & 1 C. It evens out. I did get some promising news. I may be able to stay @ my school while I am interning! I won't be getting paid, but I wouldn't if I were @ another school either & I get to be with my besties! Yay! Well, it hasn't been confirmed, but I am praying that it will work out.

My kids have been decent. I am excited about their Christmas this year. They wanted to have surprises this year so I had fun shopping.
BTW: I am done! So I will start shopping for my self tomorrow!
I want some shooties and snow boots. I may pick up a couple of pairs of pants. I'm not sure. I probably should wait until after Christmas and do my shopping.

So bloggers, what are you up to? How's life been treating you? Talk to me....

Sassy Me





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Why Am I Pissed?

So my birthday has come & gone. I am now (whisper) 37. I had a good time with my parents eating and talking and doing mounds of homework. In the back of my mind I was thinking about when I was going to see the Young Buck & what we were doing for my birfday. I was so excited to get his texts and facebook wall post wishing me a happy birthday. He even texted me @ 4:30 am so that he would be the first to say happy birthday to me. I was sooo happy! I mentioned that I wanted to go to a jazz club on Saturday and he was like , "cool".
So what do I have to be pissed about? He never called! No text, call Fb message. NOTHING!!!!
I know, I know. I said no feelings. No expectations. But there it is... A feeling, sitting in the corner waving at me.
I tried so hard to keep this light and just flirtatious, but it didn't work. What is wrong with me?

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Birthday Week!

So, I am on day three of my birthday celebration. It has been a great week. Too bad my Young Buck has been MIA. I think that it has to do with how upset I was about the Professor and his new woman. He has not been answering my texts all week. Hmmmm.
Anyway, I began celebrating on Sunday with my family @ a dinner buffet. Monday some of my students gave me gifts and some balloons. Today I received more cards and gifts. My team threw me a birthday breakfast as well. Then this afternoon we had chocolate chip cookies. Too. Much. Food.
Tomorrow I will be hitting the road to see the folks! I love having them all to myself before my sisters and brother come.
Saturday I will be back in town and I'll try to round up some folks to go out to a new jazz club in town. Good food, good music and good friends... Nothings better!

So have an outstanding Thanksgiving and I'll see ya l8ter!

SassyMe
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Where Do Broken Hearts Go ?

So, confession time again.. (I've been doin' lots of that lately.) LOL.
I was really feeling the Professor and I thought that he was feeling me some too (in his own dorky way). He has been distant and different in recent weeks, but I thought that it was because of my relationship with Young Buck. He acted funny when anybody mentioned him so I kinda stayed away and did my own thing. I would be cool when I saw him, but didn't really stay in his face.
Annnny wayyy, on Sunday Professor brought his new woman to church! Shut the front door! I was beside myself, but I kept it cool. She was the typical LSLH & wasn't even cute. Well, she kinda was. But the point is this.... I REALLY thought that one day the Professor & I would get our stuff together & be together. I know that it could still happen, but the odds are against it.
I asked my good guy friend who I consider my big brother what was up with P. He said that P didn't really want me, but he wants me to want him. That's why he is engaging me in conversation and flirting when I am not paying him any mind.
I think that Bone is right about that, but it still hurts. Now why does it hurt, because I feel like a fool or because I really wanted him? Both.
But the good part is that I told my Young Buck about it last night. He hugged me real tight and told me that it would be okay. He said that I was too good for P and that I was still cute as a button. He kissed me on my forehead and was so sweet. Awwww! That's why I like him so much! He knows that he is just my side piece and he can play his position like a champ! Maybe since the Professor is out of the picture he can have the #1 spot.
I am still sad because I know that I have wasted years on this man that I won't get back. Also, I can't let the Youngin really get the top spot because he is a youngin.
What is a girl to do? What if my Young Buck decides that he wants to get into a relationship with someone else closer to is age and that our fun is over? What if I only get hit and quit offers and no man wants me? I get lots of one night offers, men just want to get some and not have a relationship.... Such is life, I guess.

I guess I should not dwell on the negative, but focus on the positive.... Can anyone tell me what that is?

Yours in sassiness,

SassyME
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Is the break over yet?

I am so sprung over the young buck. We are still "claiming" to be just friends, but can't stay away from each other.
I have purposely not texted or Facebooked him because I am trying to keep the break in place, but it is difficult.
When I saw him last week he grabbed me and hugged me so hard that it took my breath away! He smelled great as usual. Mmmmm. He is not making this easy at all... I guess he forgot that we agreed to step back. Right. He is still trying to hit, but I ain't no little girl that he can fool. (Whatever, I need to pray to keep my knees together)

Oh, I've got to send a shout out to my friend Prettyface and her man. They are the only friends I've shared this blog with. It was tough to allow them to see me so vulnerable and naked, but I pride myself on being honest so I guess I can share with them. I ain't perfect, even though I try to be.

This month is my birthday and I intend to celebrate to the fullest! Y'all keep prayin for me!
SassyMe
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Test of mobile blogger. :)